Thoughts, always thoughts clouding my mind...
It's forever grey and things get jumble I sometimes can't make sense of things.
Everyday gets harder and harder or so it seems anyways.
Maybe I need some space...maybe I need some time to myself to re-collect my thoughts and make sense of things that are so jumbled; they're entangling me in thier web of confusion.
I do need time...to gather and analyze myself and whats really going on in my mind...how I really feel and not what my mind and body are telling me how I feel.
Time to just be by myself and get some of my shit done thats long past due.
I'm running on empty and time is almost up for
October 13, 2010 Later On by Vampriss17, literature
Literature
October 13, 2010 Later On
Problems occur uncontrolably...
I feel as if I must make excuses for myself constantly...for my actions.
Only I'm the only one who knows what my actions are.
What have I done, I wanna ask myself...have I even done anything at all.
Reoccuring thoughts and questions in my mind...over and over, never ending...
I often wonder about myself, how I keep it all together, how I stay connected with everything on the inside when I can barely deal with the things on the inside...
Always wanting to scream...always screaming on the inside...
Pounding on the walls harder and harder...my hands start to bleed...
My voice horse from screaming "Help" "L
The amount of time spent can't disclose what would become when exposed...and it will become exposed eventually...everything does.
I try to remember what already lies ahead because the mind likes to play evil tricks and the heart is as devious as the devil himself.
Alas what if its an unseen triangle torn between 2 lumminous worlds...both could be great, both could crash, one could top the other but there's no way in knowing for sure or maybe it's not at all.
I feel trapped oncce again like always, like me and captivity go hand in hand as stars on a clear night.
So confusing and the frustration is too much to take on right now.
I don't wa
To a dear old friend.... by Vampriss17, literature
Literature
To a dear old friend....
First off you should know who you are and I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for giving me the extra push to move on with my life.
I was once walking along a rugged clif when you came along and knocked me down
Instead of just falling like most people do I was determinded to hold on
Later I soon realized that the even though it was difficult the hardest part wasn't letting go it was holding on
When you came back around and extended your hand to me for what I thought was a climb up
You soon showed me it was just so you could drop me down
I was angry at first, thinking how could you just throw me off a cliff like that
But soon I r
Turtle,
I hate what you've done to me. You know if you would've been honest from the begging none of this would've happened. I told you my reasoning for going down there. It was either to get you back or to leave you behind cause I was finally ready to let you go. Instead of telling me you were still in love with your ex and that you still wanted her, you lied and got with me. By doing so you re-opened the almost locked door of my heart just to turn around less than a month later to tear it up AGAIN; as if planned, like you were just toying with me so I wouldn't leave you behind. Whether or not it's true doesn't even matter now. I'm putti
So you like Twiligt...here you go....Good-bye!
Stung, as if slapped
Trying to understand this
Desperation wells up, overwhelming dignity
Devastation paralyzing
Rain begins to pour, doesn't register
Lying there, dazed
Blank, empty
Promised it would be like it never existed
But I need to know it did
It's like a huge hole has been punched in my chest
But the pain is the only reminder that it was real
Time passes
Every tick that goes by....aches
Like the pulse of blood behind a bruise
....My final Good-bye....
Thoughts Clouding My Mind by Vampriss17, literature
Literature
Thoughts Clouding My Mind
How pathetic am I to be sitting here listening to music writing things that don't even rhyme just because sometimes I wonder what it would be like with you in my life.
With my hair washed, legs now shaven, and brusies on my knees from friends rough housing with me I sit here writing wanting to cry tears way long past due from back in the day when feelings for you were freshly new.
Sometimes when I sleep your image will silently creep into my dreams, some days good, some days bad but your image in them gets stuck in my head and then for the next 2 days I have to work on making you disappear and locking you behind secret doors once again.
So
Been holding on to things long gone
Don't know what to tell myself in situations like that
I'm happy when you're around and you make me laugh and smile
But in the end the story is still the same
You're here but I'm far behind
Because you see whats here and I'm still blind
My feelings are hard to tell because I don't want to show everything
Don't know what keeps me hanging on after all this time
After all these years you'd think I'd learn
But something keeps tugging at me
Don't know what it is or why
But for some reason some days I just can't get you off my mind
I hope your happy with your life I really am
But if you only knew wha
All this stuff in my head
Is making me feel like somthing unsaid
Everything around me is changing
Making my life go in circles
Wth everything I have inside re-surfacing
Things get out of control never ending
Looking in the mirror always wondering
Path of life going left, going right
Which way do I go? Which path do I take?
Going which ever way I guess
Seems and makes everything a mess
Senses and emotions gone astray
Those I love get pushed away
People get blocked with the barrier
Never knowing who I am, what I wish to be
Gets in my head confusing me
Things rekindled, won't go away
Makes them stop, come back another day
Writi
Hey there
I guess I should call you Dr.
Mr. analize everything so you think you know me
I laugh
You think you know me but all you know is your own thoughts.
Scared?
Like hell
Grudge
Why waste my time
I don't need you or anyone else to make me happy except for Ezekiel.
You will never break my wall and I will continue to laugh until you realize that.
Your analizations make me sick
You and your cocky attitude about how you think you know me when you don't.
Stop trying to figure me out and understand thing that you have no business knowing.
I wave
You once again walking away from another thing started that you couldn't finish.
I'm
Thoughts, always thoughts clouding my mind...
It's forever grey and things get jumble I sometimes can't make sense of things.
Everyday gets harder and harder or so it seems anyways.
Maybe I need some space...maybe I need some time to myself to re-collect my thoughts and make sense of things that are so jumbled; they're entangling me in thier web of confusion.
I do need time...to gather and analyze myself and whats really going on in my mind...how I really feel and not what my mind and body are telling me how I feel.
Time to just be by myself and get some of my shit done thats long past due.
I'm running on empty and time is almost up for
October 13, 2010 Later On by Vampriss17, literature
Literature
October 13, 2010 Later On
Problems occur uncontrolably...
I feel as if I must make excuses for myself constantly...for my actions.
Only I'm the only one who knows what my actions are.
What have I done, I wanna ask myself...have I even done anything at all.
Reoccuring thoughts and questions in my mind...over and over, never ending...
I often wonder about myself, how I keep it all together, how I stay connected with everything on the inside when I can barely deal with the things on the inside...
Always wanting to scream...always screaming on the inside...
Pounding on the walls harder and harder...my hands start to bleed...
My voice horse from screaming "Help" "L
The amount of time spent can't disclose what would become when exposed...and it will become exposed eventually...everything does.
I try to remember what already lies ahead because the mind likes to play evil tricks and the heart is as devious as the devil himself.
Alas what if its an unseen triangle torn between 2 lumminous worlds...both could be great, both could crash, one could top the other but there's no way in knowing for sure or maybe it's not at all.
I feel trapped oncce again like always, like me and captivity go hand in hand as stars on a clear night.
So confusing and the frustration is too much to take on right now.
I don't wa
To a dear old friend.... by Vampriss17, literature
Literature
To a dear old friend....
First off you should know who you are and I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for giving me the extra push to move on with my life.
I was once walking along a rugged clif when you came along and knocked me down
Instead of just falling like most people do I was determinded to hold on
Later I soon realized that the even though it was difficult the hardest part wasn't letting go it was holding on
When you came back around and extended your hand to me for what I thought was a climb up
You soon showed me it was just so you could drop me down
I was angry at first, thinking how could you just throw me off a cliff like that
But soon I r
Turtle,
I hate what you've done to me. You know if you would've been honest from the begging none of this would've happened. I told you my reasoning for going down there. It was either to get you back or to leave you behind cause I was finally ready to let you go. Instead of telling me you were still in love with your ex and that you still wanted her, you lied and got with me. By doing so you re-opened the almost locked door of my heart just to turn around less than a month later to tear it up AGAIN; as if planned, like you were just toying with me so I wouldn't leave you behind. Whether or not it's true doesn't even matter now. I'm putti
So you like Twiligt...here you go....Good-bye!
Stung, as if slapped
Trying to understand this
Desperation wells up, overwhelming dignity
Devastation paralyzing
Rain begins to pour, doesn't register
Lying there, dazed
Blank, empty
Promised it would be like it never existed
But I need to know it did
It's like a huge hole has been punched in my chest
But the pain is the only reminder that it was real
Time passes
Every tick that goes by....aches
Like the pulse of blood behind a bruise
....My final Good-bye....
Thoughts Clouding My Mind by Vampriss17, literature
Literature
Thoughts Clouding My Mind
How pathetic am I to be sitting here listening to music writing things that don't even rhyme just because sometimes I wonder what it would be like with you in my life.
With my hair washed, legs now shaven, and brusies on my knees from friends rough housing with me I sit here writing wanting to cry tears way long past due from back in the day when feelings for you were freshly new.
Sometimes when I sleep your image will silently creep into my dreams, some days good, some days bad but your image in them gets stuck in my head and then for the next 2 days I have to work on making you disappear and locking you behind secret doors once again.
So
Been holding on to things long gone
Don't know what to tell myself in situations like that
I'm happy when you're around and you make me laugh and smile
But in the end the story is still the same
You're here but I'm far behind
Because you see whats here and I'm still blind
My feelings are hard to tell because I don't want to show everything
Don't know what keeps me hanging on after all this time
After all these years you'd think I'd learn
But something keeps tugging at me
Don't know what it is or why
But for some reason some days I just can't get you off my mind
I hope your happy with your life I really am
But if you only knew wha
All this stuff in my head
Is making me feel like somthing unsaid
Everything around me is changing
Making my life go in circles
Wth everything I have inside re-surfacing
Things get out of control never ending
Looking in the mirror always wondering
Path of life going left, going right
Which way do I go? Which path do I take?
Going which ever way I guess
Seems and makes everything a mess
Senses and emotions gone astray
Those I love get pushed away
People get blocked with the barrier
Never knowing who I am, what I wish to be
Gets in my head confusing me
Things rekindled, won't go away
Makes them stop, come back another day
Writi
Hey there
I guess I should call you Dr.
Mr. analize everything so you think you know me
I laugh
You think you know me but all you know is your own thoughts.
Scared?
Like hell
Grudge
Why waste my time
I don't need you or anyone else to make me happy except for Ezekiel.
You will never break my wall and I will continue to laugh until you realize that.
Your analizations make me sick
You and your cocky attitude about how you think you know me when you don't.
Stop trying to figure me out and understand thing that you have no business knowing.
I wave
You once again walking away from another thing started that you couldn't finish.
I'm
I don’t wallow in my past but I can never let it go
I can’t ever let anything go
This obsessive need to take things too far
A true scientist at heart
I’ll test it till it dies
Or cry when it flies
I always miss it when it’s gone
I know my time here isn't long
Some are happiest when I’m gone
And all the hearts and minds that I've left frayed
Will remember me till their dying day
If that’s what it takes to be remembered
Then they will not forget the 22nd of December
But, I always miss them when they’re gone
All the marks left on this shell
Reminders of how I loved and how I failed
The holes in my h
{Him}
Just admit you want to go
Tell him how you really feel
All he asked of you was to let him know
Confess that you just don’t care
That you want to break the chains that bind
And that you will no longer be there
{Her}
Admit it was another game
Everyone knows you
You’ve never hidden your true colors, no shame
She’s waiting for you there
All she ever wanted was to be your every thing
And all you ever gave her was your stare
{Both}
What thoughts are in your mind?
What secrets would I find?
We all seem to find
Comfort in keeping
Our love and fears
Locked in the deepest
Corners of our mind
We can’t be true
To o
I put you up on high
So you only desire me
I corrupt and twist your mind
With eyes closed you cannot see
What will become of you?
With no defense against me
I penetrate all the way through
With eyes closed you cannot see
So when I lift you to space
And carry you beyond the stars
I brought you to this place
So you can’t run far
I am the black hole of hearts
I engulf them
And keep them in the dark
I am the one who traps you
Nor love or light
Has a chance to make it though
Warning signs there from the start
How the others
Fell prey, the black hole of hearts
If it’s already too late
What do you want me to say?
You can’t al
"You always were the one
To show me how
Back then
I couldn't do the things
That I can do now
This thing
Is slowly taking me apart
Gray would be the color
If I had a heart"
But, you stripped me of color
no matter how I try
I cannot replace you
with another
and, the fine lines that traced my skin
Now thickened scars that hold in
The pain you gave to me
You have betrayed me
Take this
And run far away
Far as you can see
I am
Tainted
And happiness and peace of mind
Were never meant for me
You always were the one
To show me now
That I
Could do everything
And you'd show me how
This thing
Is still taking me apart
Grey would be the color
If I had a
Almost Like Being Set Free by Darken-Drekon, literature
Literature
Almost Like Being Set Free
You have become special to me
In just short time
I'm still not sure what to think
So I will Wright you these lines
Small tokens to tell you
That you have become dear to me
I feel I can confide in you
Almost like being set free
You are someone in my life
That I want to keep
I have good dreams
When I hold you in your sleep
If I'm not there to see you
Unveil what I have given to you
Know that I have put some thought in this
And what I've told you is true
I want nothing in return
I did this on my own accord
I just wanted to show you
That you are adored
night terror
He was trying to ignore the sounds of what he was hearing, but the sounds were so soft, silky, and seductive. Begging him to just slip the covers off, and lie there with no protection at all. Stifling his body as he laid underneath his spider-man blanket, the 9-year-old boy wanted to cry out for his mom or dad, but he was too frightened. If he called out to them, he knew, just knew, whatever was out there would get him.
He had tried to explain to his parents what had been happening every night he went to sleep, begged them to put a night light in his room. But each plea for help was met with failure. "Oh, you'll just outgrow
Seductive, long black
fake eyelashes.
Each blink is
another thought;
another renegade
moment of lust.
This is a brothel
without the whores.
A sweetness with a
jagged bitterness.
Chalky, sharp
as it cools your skin.
Flutter,
only a second for
impulsive action.
Goosebumps forming,
a slow
mesmerization.
This is the
sensation of having
fireflies crawling
along your skin.
Glowing, fading away.
This is when
you begin to realize.
Honey, I will
be your ruin.
Everyone has fantasies it's just the matter of making them come true that's tricky. Especially depending on what they are and what they're dealing with. In any case, this young girl has decided to follow through with her fantasy no matter what it took. Jet black hair that went to her mid-back and the greenish eyes you've ever seen. Her face was pale white with a pinch of pinkish cheeks. Now following through with her fantasy wasn't the problem, it was how to go about it. Everything had to be carefully planned out and it especially had to be "perfect". In time she would go collect the proper tools and then delicately go about planning i
My name is Deanne Miller I'm a proud mother of 2. I hope to publish a poetry book soon. You can look me up on facebook.
Current Residence: Kerrville, Texas Favourite genre of music: 80's Personal Quote: Strength is a woman's charm as charm is a man's strength. ~Aunthor Unknown
Favourite Visual Artist
Leonardo Di Vinci
Favourite Movies
Vincent, Carrie, Twilight
Favourite Bands / Musical Artists
Poison, Bat Penatar, Joan Jett, Ozzy, Owl City
Favourite Writers
William Shakespeare, Emily Dickinson, Robert Frost, Edger Allen Poe
For all of you out there who would like to add me to your facebook here it is: deannemiller2@yahoo.com Just look me up by my e-mail and send me a message saying you know me from deviantart.
Stung, as if slapped
Trying to understand this
Desperation wells up, overwhelming dignity
Devastation paralyzing
Rain begins to pour, doesn't register
Lying there, dazed
Blank, empty
Promised it would be like it never existed
But I need to know it did
It's like a huge hole has been punched in my chest
But the pain is the only reminder that it was real
Time passes
Every tick that goes by....aches
Like the pulse of blood behind a bruise
....My final Good-bye....
I'm in a better place in my life which I've never thought I'd be in back in the old days of my never ending depression. It's wierd cause when I look back on my life, the way I did and portrayed things, even my old writings...I wonder who that person was and where they came from but at the same time relieved that they are no longer here. I wish that half of the people that I was friends with were still my friends despite the times when we dated but sadly I know that it will never be. My youngest is 7 months has his frist 2 teeth and is beginning to crawl and again I think of the past of how different his life would be if I were the same the
Hi! We haven't talked for some time - hope all is well. That's great that you're getting published and all - we can help each other - I'll read your work, since no one on dA ever really reads anything. lol. I'll send you some feedback soon!